Are you still trying to search for happiness? Wondering why so many people seem happy and you are not? Are you still scrolling through social media and asking yourself when you’ll be as radiant, as accomplished, and as fulfilled as everyone else you see on there?
First of all, don’t be deceived. Everyone you see on social media isn’t as happy and bright as they seem. People post the best of their best: looking their best, feeling their best, and smiling their best. Few are going to post sad and unflattering pictures of themselves. Some do, but that’s not the norm. And if you’re one who keeps posting depressing stories about yourself, you may turn your followers off or people may start to really worry about you.
So everyone on social media is either trying to build their brand by posting the best posts of themselves or trying to uplift others by posting lovely and refreshing posts.
2020 has been a mixed bag so far for the whole world. With the global coronavirus situation, a plunging stock market, fears of a recession, the Kobe Bryant tragedy, and the ongoing elections in the US, the first three months of 2020 have been a bumpy roller-coaster ride for all of us.
This has led to increasing uncertainties and fears. Children are fearful and anxious about all of the above—so are all of us adults!
Trust me, as I turn 50 this year, every scenario I’ve discussed with young women, I’ve also personally experienced at one time or the other, so it just shows how similar and intertwined all our lives are.
Green, yellow, white, black, African, Asian, European, immigrant, nonimmigrant, short, tall, rich, poor…we all have human issues we have to deal with from time to time.
But such is life. Such is the randomness of life. Such is the mystery of life. Life is dynamic. There will always be ups and downs. If you’ve lived several decades, you’ll know that life always throws you curveballs.
Happiness is not guaranteed. Happiness is not certain. Happiness cannot be bought. Happiness is fleeting. And happiness should never be anyone’s goal in life. If you expect to be happy most of the time, you’ll be disappointed most of the time.
So if happiness should not be our goal as humans, then what should be our goal? Isn’t happiness the ultimate emotional state to strive for?
Who doesn’t want to be happy?
Yes, we all want to be happy. But happiness should not be our goal. Peace should be our goal. Peace is the ultimate human emotional state.
Peace is permanent happiness. (My first published book is titled Permanent Happiness—and it offers ways to bring peace into your life.)
Really? Peace should be our goal? Yes, it should be, and it must be! Happiness is fleeting. Peace is constant. Happiness is reliant on external factors. Peace is reliant on your inner self and on the grace of God. To be happy, you need things, stuff, people, relationships, good news, etc. But peace is a choice you make that—regardless of any external happenings or any external circumstances—you will have tranquility of your mind and soul and be grateful regardless. Peace is looking at the bigger picture. Peace is holding on strong to faith, believing that this too shall pass. Peace is weathering every storm of life that is beyond your control and staying centered and grounded through it all, knowing that you are loved by the Creator.
So what are some practical day-to-day ways of finding peace and being peaceful?
Here are some that have helped me find peace:
- Turn off the news.
- Be close to nature. Get outside for a walk every day. Walk barefoot in nature whenever you can–this is a very grounding practice.
- Be mindful of your company. Build a positive community of family and friends. The quantity of your company is irrelevant; only the quality matters. Two great friends are better than twenty who send your mind into chaos!
- Be around pets.
- Exercise every single day, and make sure you enjoy it. If you hate going to the gym, walk outdoors instead, or try something else you actually enjoy. There are many exercise options. Yoga, Pilates, tennis....
- Choose foods to heal your body and soul. Fruits, veggies, nuts, seeds. Drink more water.
- Help someone. Help the needy. Uplift someone with your words, your time, and your gifts.
- Be optimistic. Keep a positive outlook for everything. Live by the nine fruit of the Spirit.
- Pray daily, and often during the day. “God, I need you” is a prayer. You don’t need to pray for 12 continuous hours before God hears you. He wants you to have a balanced life.
- Cook a meal with loved ones, and eat together.
- Reduce your time on social media.
- Journal every day.
- Appreciate the simple things of life—sunrises, sunsets, beautiful flowers…
- Be grateful.
- If a situation has been giving you grief and sadness for too long, walk away from it. What is your reason for putting up with it? No job or person or relationship should constantly bring you grief. You are not a tree! Walk away, and restart and reset your life!
- Read, read, and read more books.
- Practice intentional and deep breathing.
- Spend time alone every single day. This is important. Solitude is not loneliness. Solitude is crucial for our inner peace.
Do you know of any more peace-giving practices?
Please comment and share below or comment on one of my social media pages—Instagram, Facebook, or LinkedIn.
May we all find peace—permanent happiness—through all external circumstances life may throw at us.